Revisiting An Old Blog

I've been backreading and stumbled on these posts. Some things never change:

Aug. 5, 2003
Umuulan na naman. Parang alam ng mga ulap na nalulungkot ako... na gusto kong umiyak.

Ayoko 'pag umuulan. Siguro, ayoko yung pakiramdam na parang nakikiramay ang ulap sa akin.

~ o ~ o ~ o ~ o

Untitled I
There are things we believed
when we were young and naive
things we thought were real

years pass...

we realized they were
nothing but make believe
they are the things
that made us what we are today...
skeptical...
jaded...


Aug. 6, 2003
scared

I know i want to move on, break away from the past and to let go of things that are holding me back from doing so.

But I'm afraid that if I do, i might stop remembering and eventually forget.

And I don't wanna forget especially now that memories are all i have.


Aug. 7, 2003
Minsan iniisip ko, bakit ba ko nagsusulat?

Sa dami ng journals na sinusulatan ko, para namang ang dami kong pwedeng isulat. Pakiramdam ko tuloy, trying hard ako. Nagpipilit maging manunulat. Hindi naman.

Minsan makakabasa ka ng mga sulat ng iba, ang gaganda, ang gagaling. Nakaka-insecure tuloy.

E ba't nga ba ko nagsusulat? Hindi naman dahil may gusto akong patunayan sa mundo. Kundi dahil baka mawalan na talaga ako ng bait kung hindi. Kumbaga, it's one thing that keeps me sane. Nagsusulat ako kasi pakiramdam ko mas maiintindihan ako ng tao, mas maiintindihan ko sarili ko.

Ewan. San ba patungo itong sinusulat ko?