March 23, 2004 Post

Ask me what I fear the most and one probably won't hear the end of it.

one fear is that I won't have the right attitude when my faith is put to the test.

Some people has this notion that when problems arise or if they find themselves in a difficult situation, they'd think that it's a punishment for their wrongdoings. Although at times, He uses that to teach us a lesson, there are times when He allows bad things to happen because He wants His children to be closer to Him and to see if they will still on hold on to Him no matter what.

Apart from knowing this, I also know that I have to make Him the controller of my life (i.e. to give him the free rein) when I accepted Him as my Savior. It means that I surrender my everything to Him. Thus it scares me, that one day, He might test me and strip me off with everything that I have right now (just like He did to test Job, who proved his faith to Him was strong). I'm scared because I'm not too sure how I will react.

So what do I do? I pray, pray that I'd be like Job when that happens.