spot the difference

read this and this.

that is what i call a contradiction.

holy week

was spent at home

doing what?

reading - finished only 1, john grisham's the broker.
watching - it was a johnny depp movie marathon and one tree hill's season 2 marathon (i know season three is already being shown).
sleeping - when there's nothng left to do.
writing - what else?
going online - i had heavy im conversations with friends. deep and serious ones making me think more.
reflecting.

eating? no eating. i took the time off and had a 3-day diet program.

one more free day.

*deep intake of breath*

people always lie and other realizations

i've been watching house. in two days, i finished episodes 1 to 22 of season 1 (i probably would have finished it in just a day but i had to sleep too you know).

after that i had these thoughts to myself:

- He really is all-knowing. I wanted to be a doctor but He didn't let me. He probably knew that since I'm like a sponge when it comes to people and feelings i wouldn't last in that profession. For the longest time, I've been thinking if I made the right decision in choosing IT instead of medicine. Lately, I'm thinking maybe i did. (there's the maybe still though).

- If that's how doctors are generally, then being one isn't easy. They must go through a lot - lots of guessing, conflict and guilt even.

- one thing with tv shows, or movies, or novels or comics., one is bound to come across a character similar to their own personality. In one of the episodes, House tells Cameron that he's not some charity case she can work on. i guess there's this want in me to convert someone, to make them be better men (very same reason i used to like bad guys, i know it's pathetic).

- people always lie, it's House's main belief. i wish it's not true.yes, we do.

- In one of the episodes, Chase's dad arrives in the hospital and Chase was just indifferent. He told House that he actually loves his dad. Really. He loved him that it hurt him when he didn't remember his birthday or when he didn't show up for special events in his life. He thought it would be better if he just didn't care. If he didn't care at all, he won't be disappointed anymore. He wanted to feel numb. Sometimes that's just what i want to do. To just DON'T CARE.

- Cameron said something like this to House: "I (always) thought you're not capable of loving. You just don't love me." I used to have this notion that he wasn't capable of sticking to one girl and be really serious with her. But now that I know he's still with her girlfriend years ago, it means he just didn't like me. He didn't. And i should stop making myself believe that at one point, he actually did.

- it's because of these stories and lines that draw me from one series or another. the sadder the quotes and the stories, the more it appeals to me.

i

i am: discontented.
i miss: being in college.
i want: to go and live elsewhere.
i hate: commuting when it rains.
i have: many things i want to do all at once.
i fear: i'd be involved in this current project no matter how i don't want to.
i play: luxor during lunch breaks.
i hear: ne-yo's voice since his album has been playing non-stop for the last couple of hours.
i care: too much and too less, it sucks.
i smile: more than when i used to be.
i wonder: if people are really "that" busy? you ask a small favor and they can't seem to find the time to do it.
i love: God and my family and my friends.
i think: i think too much.
i always: get emotional when i shouldn't and doesn't when i should.
i am not: going to stick around when i feel like i am not needed anymore. what's important is that i was there when he needed someone.
i sing: whenever i hear a song that i know (regardless if i like it or not).
i wish: it wasn't as hot as now.
i keep: on biting my nails. i stop my nail biting and then return and then stop and come back to the same bad habit. sick cycle.
i can: only be patient up to a certain extent. we all have our limits.
i can't: stay in my current company anymore.
i write: in planners, notebooks, online journals. leave me alone anywhere with a notebook and a pen and i'm all good.
i won: during college as batch rep probably because people didn't want the other candidates to get the position.
i lost: a few things with sentimental value that i still wish i can have them back.
i smell: food cause sister's cooking.
i confuse: myself.
i need: a month break away from everything, i think.
i should: talk to Him more.

when you're bored

and you got nothing better to do, might as well go here.

where?

san na ba tayo papunta?